EOTR Match Of The Week: Bret Hart vs Diesel

By @Phranchize19

Survivor Series is over now, but I wanted to close out November with a look at one of the best matches at the PPV that wasn't a traditional Survivor Series match. Let's go back to 1995 and take a look at Bret Hart vs Diesel, the classic main event for Survivor Series.

Background
At Survivor Series 1994, Bret Hart had lost the WWF title to Bob Backlund via forfeit. Coincidentally, Diesel turned face that same evening. Three days later, Backlund lost the WWF title to Diesel in 8 seconds. Diesel’s reign as champ would begin in 1994 and he would meet Bret Hart on 2 separate occasions for the WWF Title, once at the Royal Rumble and once at the 1994 King Of The Ring, when Bret was the champ. Each time, their encounters were good as Bret made Diesel work and pushed him to the limit. When Survivor Series 1995 arrived, we had their third PPV match. Let's look back at this match.

The Match
We start with both men taking the protective padding off of two of the turnbuckles. As the match began, Hart would attempt to go after the legs of Diesel but Diesel would take control throughly. Bret would attempt to slide out of the ring only for Diesel to come after him. Diesel would then bring the brutality into the match by striking Bret with a chair. Diesel would attempt a Jacknife powerbomb but Bret would block it then bite Diesel and slowly begin to take control. Bret would attack the legs of Diesel next. Bret would lock a figure four leglock in but then break it and get back on the attack of the legs. Diesel would then regain control but Bret would counter again and take control.

Bret would get a chair and while Diesel would block the first few attempts, Bret would eventually go to work on a tied up Diesel with a chair. Bret would literally wrestle Diesel while his leg was still tied. Diesel would finally counter and throw Bret Hart off the top rope. Diesel would untie his leg and proceed to take control of the match. Diesel would throw Bret into the exposed turnbuckle chest first. Bret Hart would again take control of the match but Bret couldn’t keep him down for a three count. Diesel would then take control and attempt his powerbomb on a seemingly lifeless Bret Hart but Bret would sucker him in and roll him up and get the three count to win the match and the title.

Highlights
-Bret Hart gets thrown into exposed steel hitting the back of the head
-Bret would tie Diesel’s leg to the turnbuckle
-Diesel would knock Bret Hart off the ring apron into a table

Grade and Analysis
When you look at Kevin Nash’s career, he hasn’t exactly had many classics but this was one of them. Bret was one of the few that could make Diesel look great as well as bring out the best in him. Bret was such a magician in the ring and his ring psychology is one of the best ever if not the best. These two crafted a beautiful story and the Diesel heel turn at the end of the match was beautifully done. With a year of teasing it as well as showing signs of stress as WWF champ, he finally cracked.  The announce team of McMahon, Jim Ross and Mr. Perfect sold this story perfectly and the crowd was thoroughly engaged.

Rating: 10/10

-Phranchize 

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Eyes on the Ring 12:38 AM  No comment

EOTR Tag Team Tuesdays: Shawn Michaels and Diesel

By @TrueGodImmortal

When we started this Tag Team Tuesdays article series, I knew Ameen had an affinity for makeshift tag teams and singles competitors who team up, and when that became apparent, I knew this day would come. It was a must anyways. However, I didn't know when this day came that I would be the one covering the team, but this makes sense now. As a kid, the first tag team I was a fan of was Shawn Michaels and Diesel. I had just started watching wrestling at the time and though I later became aware of The Rockers and The Hart Foundation, it was Shawn Michaels and Diesel that became my favorites. They were known as Two Dudes With Attitudes, and they were positioned as the coolest team in the WWF.

The team formed in 1993, when Diesel became the bodyguard and the muscle for Shawn Michaels. The two began getting over as a unit and eventually it seemed as if they wanted to go for the tag team championships. Shawn was successful as a solo star and it seemed like they had the chemistry they needed to be successful. As 1994 began, they were on the path to greatness as we watched Shawn capture the IC Title. Diesel helped Shawn maintain that title until Wrestlemania 10 when Razor Ramon took the championship. Diesel would win the IC Title from Razor Ramon, taking the belt back and setting the tone for the future of the Two Dudes With Attitudes. It was shortly after the IC Title run that we saw seeds planted for a tag team title run and this is where everything finally came full circle.

In August 1994, we saw Shawn and Diesel take the tag titles off of The Headshrinkers. This was a short lived reign essentially, as literally the night after, Diesel lost his IC Title to Razor Ramon due to interference from Shawn and Walter Payton (no need to elaborate). During their tag team title reign, there weren't too many big matches involved, but Shawn and Diesel would win two squash tag team matches in September 1994. Their first official breakup came after Survivor Series 1994, when Diesel went off on his own and won the WWF Title from Bob Backlund. This set up the big main event for Wrestlemania 11 between Shawn and Diesel, and now the two former best friends were big rivals. This would not last long as the night after Wrestlemania 11, HBK was turned babyface after an attack by Sycho Sid and being rescued by Diesel. Still, the Two Dudes With Attitudes weren't fully back yet. Shawn was written off TV for a month or so, and when he returned, he set his sights on the IC Title while Diesel was having one of the worst WWF Title reigns I've ever seen.

In the summer of 1995, these two reunited to do battle for the tag team titles against the champions Owen Hart and Yokozuna. After a huge booking mishap by WWF, the match ended in a stupid finish that did see Shawn and Diesel win the tag titles again, but eventually the decision was changed and they were forced to forfeit the championships. After this, the two teamed sparingly through the end of 1995, but both men had their eyes squarely on one common goal: The WWF Title. Diesel lost the title to Bret Hart and began his heel turn, and dissension was teased between Shawn and Diesel yet again, but they still remained partners for the most part on TV. After some random tag team matches, the two would go their separate ways following another break up that led to HBK being Diesel's final opponent in WWF before he left for WCW. After 1996, we didn't see anything from HBK and Diesel until 2002 when they reunited for the NWO angle, but they would team up here and there in 2003 during the feud they both had with Evolution until Diesel (Kevin Nash at that time) left the WWE for a second time.

While they weren't a legendary team, together HBK and Diesel made a huge impact on wrestling and the WWF during their time as a unit, winning the tag titles twice and feuding with each other over the WWF Title. They will be remembered separately as legends, but together, Two Dudes With Attitudes were definitely fun to watch during the New Generation Era.

-True

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Eyes on the Ring 1:05 PM  No comment

Eyes On WWE: The 5 Worst Summerslam PPVs

By @TrueGodImmortal

In reality, the biggest show of the summer has been more lackluster over the years than exciting. The truth is, while WWE builds the show up very well, it sometimes misses the mark. In the history of the event, we've seen some great contests and of course we've seen some terrible matches. Sometimes, we get a great card and other times, we get a terrible card. Today, I wanted to look at the latter and the times that we get the terrible shows. Let's take a look at the worst Summerslam events.

5. Summerslam 2006

-I wasn't as invested in wrestling during this period due to real life, but I saw this show live and was disappointed. Extremely disappointed. I thought about putting shows from the 80s on this list or even the 1994 edition, but at least that card had a classic and solid IC Title Match with a decent tag team match. Aside from a decent John Cena vs Edge match with a solid build, the show suffers from a pointless DX vs The McMahons match, a very mediocre Batista vs Booker T match, and a confusing Big Show vs Sabu ECW Title Match. Even the Hulk Hogan vs Randy Orton match was well below any high expectations. Just not a fun PPV to sit through.

4. Summerslam 2007

-It still surprises me that I ordered this PPV. It bothers me actually. I was excited. I figured CM Punk was set to become the ECW Champion. Triple H would make a triumphant return. Cena vs Orton seemed like a big match. Rey Mysterio would be coming back as well. I figured, there's no way WWE could mess this up, right? I was very wrong. The Triple H return was awkward and lackluster, and the match itself was very disappointing. The Rey Mysterio return did nothing for me and the match itself against Chavo Guerrero just didn't go well. The only highlight on the show would be the Cena vs Orton match, but even that was slightly disappointing. Without any real highlights minus a decent triple threat and a mostly solid main event, this card falls way below the standards of the best.

3. Summerslam 1993

-This would be no. 1 if it wasn't for the fact that the top 2 choices had the opportunity to he better and literally just out right refused to be. It was interesting to say the least with this PPV, as watching Lex Luger vs Yokozuna as the main event told me that the WWF wasn't in the best place at that time. Losing Hulk Hogan, and trying to find his replacement couldn't have been easy and the same could be said for the lack of in ring work from Randy Savage, another legend. There are slight bright spots on this show with Shawn Michaels vs Mr. Perfect and Razor Ramon vs Ted Dibiase in his final WWF PPV match, but the rest of the card, including The Undertaker vs Giant Gonzalez was absolutely dreadful to watch. Even worse? After Lex Luger wins the match by DQ but doesn't win the title, he has the dumbest celebration of all time as if he became champion. A hilarious end to a terrible event. 

2. Summerslam 2010

-This show had potential. WWE was working toward a new era it seemed with the Nexus, but they were still in the Cena era. It was really odd to be honest. It seemed like every time the WWE attempted to move forward, Cena would bring them back. In addition to that, the card on paper was lackluster. CM Punk and the Straight Edge Society against the Big Show, a short and pointless Dolph Ziggler and Kofi Kingston match, Melina vs Alicia Fox, an awful Kane vs Rey Mysterio match with a laughable Undertaker appearance, with the only decent match coming from Randy Orton and Sheamus as Orton was settling in as a fan favorite. The main event is really too long and it was anti climatic as Daniel Bryan returning after two months of being "fired" didn't really have a huge impact. Plus, Cena killing the Nexus momentum just killed the whole group. It was over after that. For that, this show definitely has to make the list.

1. Summerslam 1995

-The truth of the matter? There was no way in hell this PPV could be great. There was a great IC Title Match between Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon, which should have closed the show. For some reason, Vince was an idiot and decided to close the show out with the absolute worst main event ever in Summerslam history: Diesel vs Mabel. Add to that the fact that they wasted other top wrestlers on lackluster matches (Bret Hart and The Undertaker), and in reality, this is the most disappointing Summerslam because of what it could have been. And, once again, the show was closed out by Diesel vs Mabel. Diesel vs Mabel. Diesel vs FUCKING MABEL. Enough said.

-True 

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Eyes on the Ring 11:34 PM  No comment

WIRTB Review: King of the Ring 1995

Guess who's back, back again? SOTB!!!'s back, tell a friend.

After some EOTR Role Reversal Roulette, I've returned with a somewhat easy WIRTB Review (don't worry, I'm going to get back to the Souled Out series...maybe. I mean, even I can only take but so much punishment). In 1995, WWE sucked more than Sunny in an ECW locker room. 1995 WWE sucked more than a fifty-nine year-old former porn star usually does at trying to portray herself as a squirter...or halfway attractive from the asshole up at this point (and even then, we're completely pushing it). 1995 WWE sucked more than the hookers on St. Paul Street in Baltimore around 5:30 in the morning. Hell, I'd even put the International Incident and 1996 WWE higher than 1995 WWE. At least by 1996, we knew that WWE blew loads and lowered our expectations accordingly. Plus, 1996 WWE at least had the first "Austin 3:16" promo.

Yes, it does, Stone Cold. Yes, it does.

Anyway, let's get into it. Live from Philadelphia, PA, it's King of the Ring 1995 aka The Fat Ass That Gravity Forgot.

Our first match of the evening is Savio Vega and Yokozuna with Razor Ramon and Mr. Fuji and Jim Cornette in their respective corners. This match is for the KOTR quarterfinal. There's nothing to this match really. Savio gets the win subbing for an injured Razor. Yay, I guess. My give-a-fuck-ometer is already reaching empty. Savio was never a bad or good talent. He just...existed in WWF/E.

Next up? The Roadie Dogg--err, I mean, The Roadie and Bob Holly. This match was solid, until the finish. The finish was just...no. Just no. Did Vic Venom have a hand in this one? Nope. Russo didn't become part of creative until 1996. This is all...well, who-the-fuck-ever was in charge at this point.

Afterwards, Shawn Michaels and Kama end up fighting to a draw. Now, let me get this straight: one of your hottest talents in the company, he draws. But, he draws to a man who, at this point, is still relatively low-card. He fights to a draw with the Proto-Boogeyman. He fights to a draw with the Ho-less Ho-Train-engineering Godfather. He...y'know what, it can't get worse, right? Michaels lost, but at least Kama is a fucking menacing force, somewhat. He's a big black guy, and we all know big black guys in WWF are usually fucking menacing savages who kill everything in sight...and whatnot.

But, it can't get worse, right?

I think that the Wrestling Gods hate me because I forgot that this was the PPV where Mabel defeated The Undertaker. The fucking Undertaker, a legend, a wrestling god, was defeated by a man who was essentially a jobber that got a bigger chance because he was a bargain bin Kamala (in other words, big black guy who you could portray as an angry big black guy with savage tendencies). Seriously, Nelson Frazier, later in his career, may he RIP, was able to do his own thing. But here? He's Kamala mixed with PN News. 

Plus, his matches at this point were more botch-prone than a Survivor Series 5-on-5 match with 10 Bella Twins clones and Summer Rae officiating. I mean, for fuck's sake, he (maybe, per Kevin Nash) injured Rikishi! If you're out there injuring the Samoans, you know you're fucking up. They're supposed to be impenetrable. He even broke Taker's orbital bone, which led to Phantom of the Opera Taker, but still. Nevertheless, Mabel defeated Taker to move on to the KOTR Final.

After that bit of infinite sadness, we're treated to, essentially, a nothing match between Savio and Roadie--even though it determines who goes to the KOTR Final. It wasn't bad, it wasn't good. It just existed. Even though Savio was booked to be the underdog, I couldn't get behind him--at all. Maybe it was the "Batista/Roman Reigns winning the Royal Rumble over Daniel Bryan" vibe that the Mabel/Taker match had, but I could've given zero shits about this match--and that still would've been too many.

After the previous PPV (IYH 1, which I WIRTB'ed a few months ago), we get yet another Lawler/Hart match because everyone in the land brayed with glee at the idea being tossed in our faces again. This time, we get a Kiss My Feet match. What is it with Vince and having one grown man kiss another grown man's body part? I mean, yeesh. There have been countless "Kiss My Ass" matches over the years for no damn reason other than "hurr-durr, sophomoric humor. Derppp Vince like this, so let's keep at it." Hell, Lawler's been involved in a good portion of these clusterfucks.

Now, I wouldn't be as mad at this match if it were kind of a quick squash. But, it goes on for almost ten minutes. That's not even counting the fact that the feud itself had gone on for years before this! At least from this match and feud, we got Isaac Yankem, D.D.S., who evolved into Kane (but not before some sort of match involving a shark cage?!) and still trolls the upper-midcard to this day. Seriously. People talk about Big Show being involved too much. Have you jackholes met Kane?! Even when he's used up his last bit of usefulness, WWE pumps life back into him, injects him into an upper-midcard-to-main-event-level feud/storyline, and lets him linger up there for months (sometimes years) on end. Why? Because they don't have shit else to do with him and they feel bad letting him ease off into the sunset because he's KANE! But, it can't get worse...right?!

We still have close to twenty-five minutes left in this fuckery. However, for the PPV to be called King of the Ring, the KOTR match isn't the main event. That's like having WrestleMania and having the main event be Machine Gun Kelly perform some shit-tastic "rap" music. Or like having Machine Gun Kelly, a skinny white guy who Kevin Owens could probably pick up and murderize with one hand in real life should it ever come to that, pretty much no-sell a pop-up powerbomb (the move which has knocked out quite a few Superstars thus far, including Jesus Juan Cena) like the piece of shit asshat that he is.

KO: "Lace up?" How about "lay down?"

Our last two matches feature 6 talents and maybe one of which can actually move in the ring in a way that doesn't look clunky, clumsy, or tears quads (there! Speed on the Beat finally made a quad joke. Now, I must be part of the IWC, right?!). 

First up, the KOTR Final which sees Mabel defeat Savio Vega to a sea of "ECW!" chants. Now, just last month, Savio was being pushed as a new breed of superstar. He saved Razor Ramon for fuck's sake. Now, four matches into the night (ugh), he's cannon fodder for Mabel? Ok, WWF. I'll bite. Where can I get the crack that you were smoking on twenty years ago? On top of giving Mabel the KOTR title, he ends up getting his top heel billing stripped because he wasn't ready and was dangerous in-ring? Sounds like someone from the past couple years, right? You'd think that WWE would learn from their mistakes once in a fucking while. But, noooooooo. We still get Ryback challenging for the WWE Championship a couple months into his main roster career, failing, getting repackaged ten times, then potentially finding his niche as an upper-midcarder who could still be a competent champion if booked correctly. We still get FAT ASSES pushed to the moon because they're big and tall and look larger than life, even though they move like shit. 

Newsflash, Vince and others. André the Giant, even in his later career, could wrestle circles around Big Show. Why? Many of the super big men of today aren't as agile or as good. It's like they, meaning the Wrestling Gods, stopped making 6'6"+ men who could still go in their mid 30s into their forties since they hit perfection with The Undertaker. He has the bigness of an André. He had the agility of an oversized Shawn Michaels. He can walk the fucking top rope. Sure, his matches against Brock and Bray have been meh. But, wouldn't your matches be meh too if you only went at it once a year? 

You know what? Fuck the last match. Just...no. Fuck it. The field in which I grow my fucks for Tatanka has been barren since I first saw his Indigenous American Ultimate Warrior ass as a kid. And, I don't think we need to ask the question I always pose. Fuck yes, it was that bad. From top to bottom, it was horrid. It was putrid. It was just shit. I'm about to break my WIRTB sobriety after this fuckery.

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Eyes on the Ring 10:10 AM  No comment

WIRTB Review: IYH 3

Oh, New Generation. I really wish that I didn't have to perform defecatory services upon your lifeless corpse. However, you just make it so easy. I'm Speed on the Beat and welcome to yet another WIRTB Review, the EOTR series where I make up my own acronyms and review the crap, so you don't have to. I've taken a break from my Game of Thrones binge-a-thon to cover an event that screams "my little brother booked this in WWE 2k15 because he thought it'd be a great idea to do to give John Cena and Roman Reigns complete reign over the WWE." I'm talking about, as mentioned, In Your House 3 a/k/a the one where we got three belts, one match, and a couple years of WTF afterwards.

If you ever had to make a case for "backstage politics," look no further than this match. And, yes, I'm anticipating Shawn Michaels to superkick the block button on Twitter to block me after this one. Strangely, I'm cool with that. Because this main event shouldn't have happened--video game or otherwise. Anyway, let's get into the matches. Let's run down the dark matches.

Goldust def. Bob Holly: Goldy is at his goofy cartoon stage, but still not completely at his weird sexually open self that we see in the Attitude Era.
Ahmed Johnson def. Skip: Uh,,,enough said. Next,
Fatu def. Hunter Hearst Helmsley: And Rikishi didn't even do it for The Rock this time.
Taker def. Mabel: Because the world asked for this feud, right?

Our first non-darkie (and that sounded so less racist in my head) pits Savio Vega versus Waylon Mercy. In other words, OG Sin Cara's push versus 2015 Bray Wyatt. Savio wins, because reasons that include Waylon (get it? Wailin' [for] Mercy? It's genius!) leaving WWF after this match. But, at least Waylon damn near kills Savio with a brainbuster, right? Because what's more important: not killing the guy in the ring or trying out something new to get over/piss someone off?

Fuck this next match. It's shit. No, literally, there's (kayfabe?) pig slop and shit just around the ring because it's everyone's 274th favorite hillbilly Henry Godwin versus Sycho Sid. First, how the hell did Sid go from being a major contributor to the Next Generation to...this? Well, people stopped giving a shit. That, plus injuries, and him joining the Million Dollar Corporation with...Tatanka. So, again. Fuck this match.

Owen Hart leaves the arena. Smart man, that Owen Hart.

There's something resembling a match between BBB and British Bulldog that they're hyping to come on next, but I'm already saying fuck this company. And that's usually reserved for WCW. BBB doesn't give a shit...at all. Why should I? BBB's big moves get countered and little to no pops. BB's moves get little to no heat. And I give little to no fucks.

Shane Douglas and Razor go up next. Something something punch, something something Razor's edge, something something 1-2-3 Kid run-in to advance his feud with Razor.

Bret Hart wrestles a pirate. No, I shit you not. Bret Hart wrestles Jean-Pierre LaFitte, a guy who was supposedly related to a real pirate. He wore an eye patch for his glass eye and everything. He also tagged with The Mountie at one point. The match was decent, but I couldn't care much considering what came before it and what came after it.

So, with that said, let's get into our main event. Owen Hart left because his wife was preggers. Guess who he's replaced by? The British Bulldog. So, in our main event, we've got Diesel and HBK (WWF and IC Champs respectively) versus Yoko and BB (Tag Team Champions) for a "one ring to rule them all" match. Whichever team won, they'd win all the belts. Or something like that. I watched it on the Network and I'm still slightly confused by it. Anyway, Bulldog spends most of this match getting destroyed. Yoko puts everything in a rest hold. All is lost for a dirty screwjobby finish until...OWEN HART COMES BACK!

And then gets pinned by Diesel.

Nothing about this PPV made sense. At all. It's like having sex with a woman made of barbed wire. The insanity doesn't hurt less the closer you get to the finish. If anything, it's made more insane that you'd put yourself through such stupidity.

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Eyes on the Ring 2:23 PM  No comment